Monday, May 10, 2010

Things I didn't know...

There is so much that you just can't possibly know about babies and/or pregnancy before you experience it... I am experiencing them in somewhat of a reverse order... but hey... in light of my limited time for typing these days, I'll do "Meg" style and do a list with bullets!
  • When they tell you to sleep when the baby sleeps - even when it's against your normal rhythm... FOLLOW that advise as much as possible! 
  • Newborns sleep a lot, right? They do... but you'd never guess how exhausted you can be from the constant up and down of the feeding, burping, diaper changing routine. 
  • Must have items... bouncy seat and a swing!! (We don't have the swing yet, but it'll be our next purchase!) 
  • I had NO idea that something that small would produce THAT amount of laundry and dirty bottles... spring for the dishwasher baskets for whatever bottles you use... you will NOT regret it!
  • I haven't experienced this one yet - but have been warned: People you do not know will reach out to touch your baby in public places... keep them covered up. (I might have to go ninja on some strangers if they touch my baby!) 
  • I didn't initially realize that the sleepless nights and sheer love for the child will push you to your limits both physically and emotionally.
  • There is a certain amount of guilt that you'll feel if you make your working spouse get up in the middle of the night with the baby while you are on maternity leave... sometimes you can't help it though.
  • There are small moments in the middle of the night while you are feeding your baby that you will wonder what in the WORLD you did to your life... (it is just the exhaustion) but then those little tiny eyes look up at you and you come back to reality and remember that the night time feedings are only a season in the giant scheme of parenting as a whole.
  • You will pray and wish that it was Friday night/Saturday night all week so that the working spouse can take over the night-time feedings for a little break. 
  • Even at 1 month old... there is a certain comfort that only a parent can give... as much as those grandparents and aunts want to - you just pick up the tricks as a parent that will soothe your baby better than anyone else can. 
  • I personally am an idiot on this one - but allow those that offer to help you... people will offer to bring you meals, help clean your house, watch the baby while you nap, and many other things... I personally couldn't handle any more than the meals because I felt bad for imposing... but really - you will not regret letting people in to help. 
  • You will want to be superwoman instantly, but it just doesn't work that way... sometimes babies cry and there is nothing you can do about it... but it's okay to cry right along with them.
  • Make sure that you are comfortable with your pediatrician... we didn't do an interview appointment because of our situation, but I think even if you did - it can be a different experience when there is a baby in there interacting with the doctor... if it doesn't feel right... make a change. We did, and I am SO glad that we did!
  • Pacifiers can be both a godsend and the devil at the same time... I mean come on people... come up with something to keep the pacifier in the newborn's mouth!
  • There will be moments where your husband will offer you a good break from the baby in the form of a girls night out... but you would rather just go sleep somewhere.
  • I never knew how bittersweet it could be to start having to pack away clothes and things when your baby outgrows it. We had a good long month run at our newborn sized clothes... but they are getting pretty snug!
  • A piece of advice for those that can... seriously - get your thank you notes written before the baby comes as much as you possibly can... because it's extremely hard to get that going once the baby schedule takes over!!

    Lets change gears and talk pregnancy now... 
  • There is a LOT that happens to your body that no one tells you about... NO ONE! (and I haven't even gotten to the scary stuff yet...)
  • Sometimes doctors are bone-heads... like when mine took the time to tell me that I can get my tubes tied during my inevitable c-section... (uh, thanks... but let me just live in my miracle for a moment, k?)
  • You will eat things that will blow your own mind... for instance - I have NEVER really liked fruit... beyond strawberries... but DUDE - I can't get enough of the stuff right now. 
  • There will also be foods that you just can't get out of your head until you taste them... for me it's been coconut cream pie... and banana pudding... I still haven't had the pudding yet - but it's coming... trust me... it's days are numbered! 
  • I never realized how hard it can be to sleep on your side... personally when I succeed - something in my body goes numb every night... so I have to shift to my back. My new body pillow will be here tomorrow though! 
  • That there can be a difference between morning sickness and actual sickness... in the first 13 or so weeks... I just wanted to throw up... now I'm doing it all the time! (special shout out to my shower floor for allowing me to lay down and throw up my entire specially prepared Mother's Day breakfast... UGH!)

Said Mother's Day breakfast...
  • Maternity jeans... just might be God's gift to the women of the world! 
  • Your doctor may not want to give you an ultrasound at 16 weeks to tell you about the sex of your baby... BUT you can go at 17 weeks to most local ultrasound tech schools and get a detailed ultrasound for free to find that information out. (Yes, we are that desperate)
  • You will go to the potty WAY more than you think you could possibly manage... our TP bill has skyrocketed!
  • I never knew how long 4 weeks would seem when you're talking about not seeing or hearing your baby to know if it's growing alright... even though I've been told that the severity of my sickness is a good sign of a healthy pregnancy.
So ladies... what other things do I NOT know about either of these topics?! Help a sista out!

9 comments:

  1. OMG, I've been stalking your blog for a while and am so excited for your family's situation. I pray daily for your newborn and your newborn-to-be. With that in mind, let me tell you what I remember of newborns and pregnancy. Newborns, God bless it, I had a wonderful support system. If you can, have hubby take over baby patrol one or two nights a week from the time he gets home till about 1130 or so (or the feeding, burping, changing shift that happens closest to this time). If you are as lucky as me, that will yield sleep from around 6pm till around 1am (the next feeding, burping, changing time). It's amazing how great you feel after 7 hours of sleep plus hubby will still get his rest too. Also, my newborn had tummy issues so we gave her bottles straight from the fridge. The first sip was a shocker for her, but after that, she never gave it a second thought. And that made the colic disappear.

    As for pregnancy, my favorite food while preggo was chocolate covered pepperoni pizza (don't ask, LOL). I found that everyone warned me about the obvious things, but no one thought to tell me about the crazy dreams. My hormones did a number on me and I was having hot flashes like I was post-menopausal.

    And lastly, if you can, my best advice to new moms is each year on your child's birthday, write them a letter. Tell them how much they've changed your life and all the great new things they've learned and taught you over the year. Mail it to your home addressed to your child and keep it sealed. Present the collection of letters to them on their wedding day or the day they have their first little one. I wish I had started this earlier in my daughter's life, but I am happy that I will have something for her that only I can give her. Good luck and sorry for such a long response.

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  2. There are lots of TMI sorts of things that no one warns you about...like the other day, when I was texting on my phone and all of a sudden my arm was wet. It had been resting against my chest, which started LEAKING. Apparently this can happen as early as 6 months (it's colostrum).

    Heartburn can make you cry.

    You can be ravenous one minute, and full to the point of puking the next - eventually there's not much room for your stomach in there.

    It's possible to feel claustrophobic in your own skin. I've handled losing air pressure while scuba diving better than the difficulty I've had breathing. It can be freaky.

    At first it's embarrassing to have hairy legs at an exam. Eventually you stop caring and forget what it's like to have smooth legs - I'm not even sure my legs are still there. I can't see them, and I can no longer reach to shave by feel.

    As exciting as it is to feel your baby move, sometimes you wish it wouldn't be so strong so you can sleep.

    Sneezing and peeing...it happens. Bad things also happen if your baby kicks your bladder hard enough.

    No matter how uncomfortable you may get, you may still get the urge to punch women who are whining about how they feel, that they just want the baby out, etc. You know what a miracle pregnancy is, and find joy even in the downsides . :)

    So these may just apply to me...but consider yourself warned anyway. As tough as it gets - I would not trade this for anything in the world. It's amazing beyond description!

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  3. I know about craving things that you aren't normally fond of but what about foods that you LOVED now make you ill? If you answer that, I will have a prediction about your baby's sex. It is 100% accurate. Ok, I have only used it twice but still it was right both times.

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  4. I think that pretty much summarizes so many of the things I was and am thinking at this time in life and you are doing them BOTH at the same time girlie....I would rather sleep than go out too! LOL! But they are worth all the sacrifices and hard work! Get your sleep, I don't know how you are doing it all...the pregnancy AND a new momma you deserve a gold star! Love you! Becky

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  5. Yay for bullets! Boo because my employer blocked your url (guess I spent too much time there??) Yay for the heads up on all the baby stuff!

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  6. I think everyone else covered it all...except for a couple things that aren't very fun to talk about. Vanessa Christenson (dot com), on her blog recently, referred to babies as precious little hemorrhoid makers. Let's hope that won't be true for you. Also, you are quite possibly going to wet your pants every time you sneeze...for the rest of your life. All in all, it's still totally worth it.

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  7. Kim congrats on your pregnancy and adoption - I think I posted that previously, but I am so behind, so if I did not, I'm saying it again. I love reading your newborn tips since hopefully in a month or so I will be a mommy via adoption. I won't ever have to worry about the pregnancy stuff, so I don't have any input on that, but keep us updated with the newborn tips. I'll be referring back to them soon hopefully. Hang in there and get some rest.

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  8. Girl I wanted to wear my maternity jeans forever. They are so wonderful. The look of a jean but the comfort of your favorite sweats...... ahhhh! You ened one of these signs for your car seat if anyone tries to touch your baby. http://www.etsy.com/listing/45380513/germie-stopper-stroller-or-car-seat-sign

    Oh and just wait until they try and touch your belly!

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  9. I have a feeling that lists like this are going to be printed and placed in my "What To Expect" book. This is much more useful advice...

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Thank you so much for your comments. I really enjoy getting feedback on my writing!