Neato Keto

I've decided that my intentional journey this year will be in doing the Keto plan - I refuse to use the D word. I feel sure that most know what it is by now, but I'm keeping my net carb amount to 5% of my calories daily. My protein around 25% and my fats around 70%...

I'm no stranger to the low carb life - as I've done Atkins numerous times in the past - and I can't explain why this time is different... but it's not quite as restrictive as Atkins' first two weeks -- being that within my macros - I can have up to 25 grams of carbohydrates a day. Now, that also needs to take into account that you subtract out the fiber content from the total carbs and get the net number... so my NET carbs are under 25 grams a day.

With the many times, I've done this before - I suffered excruciating withdrawal symptoms for up to a week. I did my research on the keto flu before getting started and I was ready for it - I never knew in all the Atkins stops and starts that what my body was struggling with was the loss of sodium. So this time, I armed myself with electrolyte water and added a little more salt to things the first few days. I never really got those dreaded migraines like I have in the past. My biggest struggle has been fatigue - I go in spurts. One minute I'm feeling incredible and knocking out all. the. things. Then a bit later, I'll find myself completely worn out - so I feel like my body is still adjusting to burning fat for fuel instead of sugar.

I'm in it to win it though - so I'm just taking it one day at a time. Like I said before - I'm not looking at this as an all or nothing thing. It's my new lifestyle. So if I'm at a party or something and there are carbs, and I want some -- I'll keep it to a small amount and go on living my life. Just because I have one small thing doesn't have to derail me entirely from my whole plan.

In the past that has been my thought process, I would cave and have one thing -- and next thing you know 6 months have gone by and I've been off the wagon the whole time. Not this time... I've got a friend that I'm super comfortable sharing the slips with and we've vowed to help each other through that "failure" mentality.

I'm two weeks in on the plan so far and I'm still loving it -- I've got just enough variety that I'm happy and I'm trying out all sorts of new recipes and sharing them over on my recipe blog. If you scroll down there is a label that will pull up all of our keto-friendly recipes.

My plan is to keep to the semi-basics for the most part as much as I can and add whatever we're craving. If I need to bake something -- I'm happy to do it. I'd rather do that than buy something packaged as low carb because that way I know and can control the ingredients. This week - I made John some mini cheesecakes that are low carb and have a pecan crust. I made myself some chocolate mousse -- but I'm looking for a different recipe on that one.

In addition to my keto plan, I've added in intermittent fasting. I'm going most days from about 10 PM to 12 or 1 PM the next day to eat. I seem to be doing just fine on that and even though my doctor was strongly against it - things are going fine. One thing I can tell you that has been eye-opening is that the night before starting the plan - my sugars were 358 and since beginning the plan they haven't been over 130 even once! I'm excited to go back next month to show her by sugar readings -- maybe I'll even begin my goal of backing off of some of my medications. 

I saw the doctor the day before we started and she put me on a new shot that is helping curb my hunger as well - I'm virtually NEVER hungry anymore... and I used to be a huge snacker. It's so strange... between the shot and the added fat in my diet -- I'm losing weight and never hungry. 

I haven't added this in just yet -- but it's coming. I've been seeing some ads for the Body Groove workouts and I'm thinking about getting them. It looks much for free form and I'm looking for something to completely change the way I think and feel about working out. Has anyone seen the ads or heard of this program? I'm curious how it works -- it looks like it would be fun and maybe something that James and Tyler can do with me at least whenever he wants to join in.

Well, I'm a bit late... but it's 2019!

I've learned a few things in the short time that it's been 2019, and I thought I'd start off a series of upcoming posts with that. What I've learned is that in years past - I've set goals and I've given resolutions of things like I'm going to lose 25 pounds... only to quickly fail. That gave way to me only setting resolutions of things like lose weight... with no set amount, because in my mind... even one pound gone in the year would be a success, right?

Well, none of it has been successful, and I found myself at the end of 2018 feeling pretty defeated. I thought that I was just destined to be heavy and on tons of diabetes meds for the rest of my life. Nothing could or would ever change for the better... Then I heard one of the most profound podcast episodes I've ever heard.

It was a couple of days in the new year and I was catching up on getting my Powersheets set up for the year, and determining what my goals would be and I heard something that I will never EVER forget... Two things actually: 1) There is nothing magical about January 1st. There is nothing special about January 1st other than the fact that for the next month or two you'll be writing the wrong year on everything... or maybe it's just me? 2) The reason that resolutions fail by and large is that there is no heart reason behind them. They are just shots in the dark at things that we feel like we need to improve.

That's when it clicked for me. Will I be perfect in this pursuit? Of course not, but what I can do is embrace the progress that is being made and know that things are better than not trying at all. How does that look different in real life?

It looks like choosing goals that are tied to reasons, real tangible reasons... for instance - with my weight loss goal - why do I want to do it in the first place? There are a few reasons there actually:

• to feel better and not have creaky joints
• to get off of all of my medications
• to have more energy for my family
• to be ALIVE longer for my family

Let's be real honest here - since few people read this anyway -- there is safety in putting it out there, but I was on a path to certain earlier death until I changed things. Granted I have only changed things in the last two weeks... but I'm headed in a better direction than the alternative. With my weight and my diabetes working together - it was almost a guaranteed certainty that I wouldn't make it until a natural old age. How can I look into the eyes of my family and not know to the depths of my soul that I need to do better for THEM? Take me out of the picture... but how can I not get control over this issue so that I can be there for many more years to come? 

I know that there will be struggles, but one thing I also know is that I love these people in my life fiercely -- both those that live within my home and those family and friends that I interact with on a regular basis... I happen to be someone that loves BIG often at the detriment of my own health because I also tend to be a people pleaser. Maybe of my goals, this year are all wrapped in on this topic. 

I'm one of those people that comes up with a word for the year, and each of my 7 goals for 2019 is tied to this word. My word for this year is Intentional. (I'd love to have a ring with that word stamped on it or even a bracelet -- I'll have to look for one)

Here are my 7 goals... 

1. Spend intentional time with God either through devotionals or Write the Word Journals
2. Intentional time with people that matter - John, the boys, friends, family
3. Intentionally improve health through diet, increased water, intermittent fasting, and exercise
4. Focus intentionally on our budget and debt snowball
5. Be intentional with my daily reading for enjoyment both nonfiction and fiction
6. Intentionally create a second book for publishing
7. Intentionally spend time on homemaking through decluttering and cleaning routines

Will these all happen perfectly - probably not, and some of them will take a backseat at times for the others -- but what I do know is that 2 weeks in -- I'm feeling better than I ever have and I'm showing no signs of stopping. Something has snapped in me this year and I feel so much more grounded in knowing that there will be bad days and there will be good days -- but showing up for myself will never EVER be a disappointment to those that matter. 

FreezEasy Programs

Y'all, I want to tell you about one of the BEST freezer cooking sites out there, FreezEasy! This site has some amazing monthly meal plans available, or you can also build your own plan based on your family's preferences. The greatest part is that she has something on the site for everyone's dietary needs - from Paleo to Whole Thirty - From Gluten-Free to Dairy Free... she has them all covered. Each recipe will also tell you how to swap out things where it's needed to make them fit your allergy or diet guidelines. You can also go, here, for a FREE Freezer Meal Success Guide.

The greatest part is that once you build your plan, you can immediately print out the shopping list, prep list, and get everything into your freezer within a couple hours of returning from the store! The genuis part of this site is that you can also adjust the size of the recipes to the number of portions you want - so it works great for small or larger families. 

I highly recommend joining this site, and taking advantage of all that freezer cooking can save you on those busy school nights... you can be prepped and ready as sports practices pick up and things get busier as the fall moves on. 

I've used this site for a long time, and have some recipes that have become tried and true family favorites -- the Pollo Asado -- is a GREAT addition to our recipe list. Another couple that we have loved has been the Lasagna Bake, and the Greek Chicken Bake. I'm working through some more of the freezer to Instant Pot meals right now because that is such a convenient way to prep meals rather than having to thaw it out in advance. If you're new to the Instant Pot style of cooking - there are also an Electric Pressure Cooking 101 class and the My Efficient Kitchen class offered as well. 

In addition to the regular freezer plans -- she also has a great resource in the Stork Your Freezer programs for new Moms. I would have LOVED to have been given a shower where people could have filled my freezer full of all sorts of meals for when my babies were born. There are so many ways to work this style of shower, but if I could have left meals for the new mommy while also coming home with some of my own... how GREAT would that be!? My vision for that would be to have people double up on a meal in their plan for the mom-to-be, and then take the rest home... and if every couple of guests chose a different meal plan... even better!

Here are the different meal plans to choose from for Stork Your Freezer Showers:

  
 



Last, but not least, Erin also has a Grocery Budget Makeover program that will rock your world. I've taken the course, and LOVED it. I'm still whittling down our budget, but I can't recommend this program enough to those that need it.

Intentional Bites

I want to tell you about an amazing new planner that is hitting the market very soon! I've got an advanced copy so that I can help get the word out about it. The Intentional Bites Planner is going to be a game changer!

The idea behind this planner is that no two bodies respond to the same things, and we all have our own challenges that we are trying to combat. Erin, the creator of the planner has a great video on the waiting list page that explains her inspiration. With this product, you can work through some planning pages to discover your goals, and then you can track your daily food intake as well as how you are feeling as you make necessary changes to your meals. In addition, you can track your grocery lists and meal plan both weekly and monthly!

I'm filling out my planner this weekend as I begin to uncover my new food goals in relation to my health journey. I am tired of trying every diet out there, no longer am I going to try to live my life around my diet... I'm going to change my eating plan to fit my life. I won't be cutting out entire food groups anymore -- I'll just learn how to work in the things that I want while continuing to work toward my goals.

I've done every diet in the book -- from the cabbage soup diet, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, Atkins, and 21 Day Fix containers -- you name it... I've tried it. Some I was set up to fail from the very beginning with the ultra-restrictive nature and burn out... others just weren't good at preparing you for a life after their plan. I once begged for a plan for Christmas and failed it before the end of the first day because I was STARVING... so I ended that day gorging on pizza. I've felt every sort of sting of disappointment. Now it's time to try something completely different.

Does this sound like something you'd like to do too? Get yourself on the waiting list for the Intentional Bites Planner today! Then follow along on our journey to health here... in addition to using the planner - I'm reading the book Intuitive Eating so I'll be working through my overall food demons with that as well. I'll be posting pictures and more about our weekly intentional eating prep-work too!

Fruitful Friendships

I've been a mom now for 8 years roughly, and there is a distinct shift between the friends I had before children and those I've made after having them. Now, some of the shifts have come from moving to Memphis and back while the boys were babies... but follow me here. 
There is (or there was for me) an intense time after becoming a mother -- slightly more intense because of having two babies in the span of 6 months -- of isolation and loneliness. Couple that with my extreme shyness around new people, and you've got a cocktail for a bit of depression. Just before we moved to Memphis, my doctor put me on some medications for depression because he was noticing signs of it with having two babies in itself... but that's a story for a different day. 
Since that time, we've moved home... had a couple of brain surgeries that left 2014 pretty isolated for obvious reasons... we're now entering a time when I feel very centered and like I've found myself an amazing little group of friends. We are small in number, but mighty in heart and love. 
I've found 2 women that I literally feel like I can call in the middle of the night if needed... allow them in to see the chaos and mess of our home, and they will love me right through it. Bottom line, I can be my REAL self with them. Bad attitude, occasionally petty, ungrateful at times -- self. We are from very different backgrounds, different stages of parenting, some veered away for a bit, but we just fit. 
A few months ago, we came back together stronger than ever... the kind of friendship that doesn't skip a beat after not talking for a while. The kind that needs to be nurtured and grown -- because you cherish it as much as you do your family. These two women are my sisters in life -- every bit as important to me as the sisters I got from birth and marriage. 
I hope that I bless them as much as they bless me on a daily basis as we do life together -- often through text messages and field trips with the kids -- but I look forward to our mom's nights away every month. I mean seriously, can you imagine spending 5 hours in a Chili's chatting -- and not even feeling like it has been 30 minutes? Yep... that's us. 

I promise that my constant chatter about Lara Casey is coming to a close for a bit here. (click on the photos to be taken over to her shop) But I had to share about these amazing short books that she has created to help you cultivate a few specific areas of your life that are deeply important. 
This friendship book is larger than the other two and has some amazing ideas for growing Fruitful Friendships. It tells you what that looks like, and helps you plan action steps to help your friendships grow and flourish. This is what I aim to do this summer!
I emailed my two friends about this book -- and we're planning to go through it together over the next few weeks. Lara and another lady from her office, Jess, are going to lead us all through it on Wednesdays this summer page by page on their Facebook page... every week at noon Eastern time beginning on May 31st. 

This is the couples book -- which will help you set some goals for your marriage and work toward a better/deeper connection. 
This one for Parents can be worked on with your kids, or just with your spouse... but it's another way to set some intentional goals for building the relationships in your family. 
What I love about these books is that you get to make the goals fit your family, and Lara just helps you walk through figuring out what is most important to you in this season you are in... then set goals to build from where you are. I've got all 3 of them, and plan to make a point to do my best in these 3 areas this next year. In addition to one more area... which is caring for myself from the inside out... if I'm not running at my best health (both physically and spiritually), then I'm no good to these other areas of my life.
What tips and tricks do you have for bettering your friendships, marriage, parenting, and self-care?

This is 39

Here we are, day 1 of year 39 -- I'm thinking of it as the beginning of a new book. There is nothing magical about January 1st being the beginning of new things. I've been trying to be more intentional this year as a whole, but things within myself are changing.

There is an interesting phenomenon that is happening within my mind and spirit lately -- and it's causing me to care less about what others think of me, and own who I am. You may not like who I am, but that doesn't mean that either of us are wrong... maybe we are just moving in different directions.

I've always been very much a people pleaser and mediator between those in opposition, so this is very much a shift for me. I just feel more balanced in where life is settling in right now, and I think that's a good thing. That isn't to say that I don't want to better things in several areas -- we are always a work in progress friends.

Lately, I've been watching several videos and following Lara Casey (Cultivate What Matters), Erin Chase (MyFreezEasy), and Emily Ley (Simplified Planner). These ladies are my SHE-ROES -- because their messages of simplification and putting what matters to you at the forefront of your daily tasks just really speaks to where I am today.

How many of us can relate with this lady in the photo above? I know I can, but you know what is going on here... it's a lot of our own making. I'm writing this more for myself than anyone else... because I know that I've become "too busy." Personally, I am trying to keep up with too much, and spending more time doing things virtually than I am in person. I'm shy by nature, so somethings are just outside of my comfort zone... but I want to be someone that does hard things.

How do we do that? Think about the things in your life that will matter when you are 80 (or older), and choose to focus on those things rather than the clutter that fills our inboxes and social media feeds on a daily basis. For me -- those things are FAITH, FAMILY, and FRIENDS. I'll even throw in one that doesn't start with F too -- HEALTH -- mental and physical.

Beginning this summer - those are my 4 main focus areas... so if something isn't helping with that - I'm going to start backing away from it. I'm still working on what those things are, but I plan to delete apps from my phone that take away from those things -- or apps that I don't even use. There is so much there that I don't even use... but also I want to extend an invitation to everyone out there -- join me in this journey.

I really want to dive in wholeheartedly into this -- so if you'd like to do the same -- please reach out to me. If we have been friends for zero time or since birth... lets find some time to reconnect. That might mean that we have to Skype, but lets make it happen.

For me, when I'm 80 years old... the things that I believe will matter to me are: my faith, my husband & children (hopefully grandchildren too), my extended family, my friends that have walked through life with me, and my health -- obviously the last one is incredibly important to the whole making it to 80 and beyond.

That being said... in the words of Jerry Maguire... Who's Coming with Me?

Journey to Better Health

There honestly hasn't been a year in my adult life that I haven't set a goal for better health... but I truly believe that this year, I can make it happen. I want to make small changes and be better overall... not just lose weight.

I'm going to give the Shred Revolutionary Diet a try this year. I've read through this book and the Cookbook as well... I've loved them both!

 

The plan seems like it might really work for me because it's a 6 week cycle, and each week is very different. So for someone that likes plans that offer variations at the same time as they spell out what you should do for the best results... this is right up my alley! 

I additionally plan to use the Core De Force workout plan at least for the first month of my workouts... I used 21 Day Fix for the better part of the fall and I loved it as well. I tried Country Heat too, but I'm just not much of a dancer... so it didn't really work well for me -- don't get me wrong, it is a lot of fun - it's just not my favorite plan. If you're more interested in something you can live stream into your living room -- you should check out BeachBody On Demand.

In addition to these things -- I'm going to step up my water intake, and do my best to try to get my medications under control. So I'm going to be working toward getting my health to a place that will allow for my doctor to decrease my chronic medications tapered down to a level that is less and less each time I go to see my doctor. 

I experienced that in November when my doctor lowered one of my medications based on my eating well and working out so consistently for the several months before I went to see her.

Journey to Tame the Kitchen

I've been trying to Tame several things within my kitchen since last summer sometime. If you've been around for a while -- you might remember my freezer cooking journey back early last year or the late part of 2015... back then I was planning and making a bunch of recipes and it would take 1 day to shop, another day to prep, and then 12ish hours to make those meals. That system was called Once A Month Meals. It was very time and labor intensive.

 It often left me thinking... there HAS to be a better way to do this. Who has 12 hours to stand in the kitchen -- even if it did speed up the rest of your month's meals. The other issue was that you'd make their recipes to their completion, which often left us eating things that were overdone by the time we reheated them.

That's when I learned about Erin Chase and all of her programs -- and I'm a super fan-girl of everything she does! I found her just about the time she launched My FreezEasy... it's been an amazing -- you literally can make 10 amazing meals in 1 hour! She has preset meal plans for the month - or you can get a membership to be able to swap meals out for ones that your family might like better than the ones on the preplanned menus. Additionally, she now has an app you can use on your phone or iPad too!

She has a plan for most major dietary concerns:

• Traditional Plan
• Gluten Free Plan
• Clean Eats Plan
• Slow Cooker Plan
• 20 Meals Plan
• Zaycon Fresh Plan
• All Chicken Plan
• All Ground Beef Plan
• All Pork Chops Plan 

** The great thing is that every month you get ALL new recipes planned!

With the Premium membership (I have this one) you can go through a database of all the previous recipes and swap out the ones that don't interest you -- or you can even make a plan completely from scratch! I've made two completely from scratch plans and it takes no time at all -- just the time it takes for you to look through the recipes and choose the 5 you want to make! 

Did you get an Instant Pot for Christmas and not really know what to do with it? Yep, Erin has a class coming up to help you get all of the ins and outs of using and cleaning your instant pot. It's on pre-order right now at a very reasonable price -- I'm signed up and can't wait! The start Date for the Electric Pressure Cooking 101 Class is set for January 24th. These classes will be short for your busy life, and you will be able to watch them at your convenience.

Click on this image to make it larger

 Finally, the last thing I wanted to tell you about is something that I did last fall. I took part in Erin's Grocery Budget Makeover Class -- it is a 13 week program that teaches you how to meal plan, and make the most out of your grocery shopping game. She covers couponing, sale cycles, and so much more! She breaks down every part of the grocery shopping experience and teaches you how to get the most bang out of your buck!  Think of this as the Dave Ramsey class for the Grocery Budget! One of the great things about this program is that Erin makes it available to you to retake it or go back over the information if you need a refresher at any time! You really have nothing to lose!

You can combine all three of these different AMAZING services like I have... and I will look for what protein is on sale for the week, and I'll try to make a Freezer Meal Plan based on that protein source and stash those away for all the busy weeknights when Mom feels the need to pull something out of the freezer instead of starting completely from scratch! I call that a Busy Mom WIN!

Goals for 2017

It's 2017 y'all! I'm so excited to have turned the page on the year and to have a fresh start. I don't know why everything feels fresh and new magically on January 1st, but there is just something about the start of a new calendar year that gives me a whole new hope for doing things better and being stronger.

Well, this year I've got a new tool in my belt -- it's called Powersheets! I'll have a link down below to check out to see if there are any left for you to get them. If there aren't -- you should ABSOLUTELY go over and check out Lara Casey's Blog -- grab a notebook and DIY yourself some powersheets!

I wanted to take some time and share what I came up with for my goals this year... but I want to start with Lara's overarching words for this year that we are all about Progress over Perfection. I couldn't have said that any better than she did. So with that said -- my word for 2017 is: JOURNEY!

I want to embrace all of the ups and downs that come along with setting goals for the year... which I have often let derail my goals in the past. I've so often started something, had a hiccup along the way and let that completely stop the entire process.

My main goal for this year is to NOT let those hiccups take away from the good progress that is happening in my life.

So I worked through the entire prep work section of the Powersheets and ended up with these goals.

(feel free to click on this to get a better look)

These are the 10 things that I'm working on this year -- or at least for this first season of 2017. Every 3 months there is a goal refresh process that you can work through to make sure that your goals haven't changed a bit over time. If they have - then you can change them up a bit and keep going... 

Once you've written your goals for the year out -- which you can have as many or as few as you want... then you make an action plan for each of them. 

I chose this goal to show you the action plan -- just because I wanted to show an example and I thought that this one is the most important for the year. I also bought a new bible for my work this year... 

 

This One Year Chronological Bible is on sale right now and it's the NLT version so it's going to be pretty practical. I love that it also has some adult coloring spaces as well for you to get a little creative and spend some time soaking in the Word of the Lord. Mine should be here by the middle of next week -- so I'll be working hard to get caught up to the daily reading for whatever day it delivers, by pouring into it for a few days. 

After your action plan is written in your Powersheets for each Goal -- then you fill out your monthly tending list -- which is a place for you to write in your Monthly, Weekly, and Daily tasks that will help you accomplish progress toward your goals. 

This is my Tending List for January -- and I LOVE that it has a progress bar for the monthly goals, then a checkbox for the weekly and daily goals. I'm already loving seeing the check marks getting placed in the boxes. 

If you see down at the bottom there that nothing is happening with my first 3 daily goals... well, that's because I also am in the process of reading about a new lifestyle plan that my sister uses along with her Beachbody workout systems... so I'm going to give it a shot. I just may wait another week or so to get it all planned out. I'm planning to go visit my mom for a few days a week from Monday -- so I will likely not hit the ground running with this plan until the last week of the month, but I do plan to start working out again next week and getting more water in... and making healthier choices with food once we are back into our other routines. 

I'll write more about what I'm planning to do here in a few more days -- once I've finished the book! 

Use this link below to check out the shop where all of these amazing Powersheets and other items can be found. There isn't a thing on their site that I don't have on my wish list!

Bulk Freezer Cooking - Cooking Day

By now you've planned your menu, done your bulk shopping, and have had your prep time. Hopefully you've got all of the kitchen supplies that you'll need for this bulk cooking extravaganza. I have more cooking supplies than most, and even I found myself amazed at the sheer volume of things I was able to get dirty in one session.

Seriously, there cannot be too many cooking spoons, measuring spoons, measuring cups, and mixing bowls in your house... the more the better for an adventure like this! In some cases, and for some menus -- you'll even need two crockpots -- so you may need to plan ahead and borrow one from someone.

Make sure you print all of your cooking day instructions AND recipe cards. I taped the cooking day instructions to my cabinet so that I could check them off each time I finished a step. A good thing to note too: the cooking instructions are set up so that you will get through the most complicated portions of the cooking first and save the simpler tasks for the end of the day. Had I planned and prepped accordingly -- my first cooking day would have gone a bit smoother.

When it comes down to your cooking day - remember these tips:

1) Get a good nights sleep & plan to wake up early to get started.

2) If possible, get a baby sitter or mother's helper to come in and take care of any littles at home.

3) Wear your best supportive shoes, because you literally will be on your feet for a good 8-10 hours.

4) Document your experience so that you will learn from your own mistakes.

5) Take notes so that you'll know if there are things you would change in how you managed this process.

6) Follow the instructions to the letter, and label each item as it gets packed. With the recipe labels provided or with a Sharpie. Include the date on your bags for the freezer so that you'll know how long it's been in there.

7) Remember that these recipes are for the main dish -- so you will need some refresher items from the store, and side dish plans for the meals as needed.

They've even included a sheet you can pin up somewhere in your kitchen that tells you how to thaw things for you to be able to prepare them or just eat them in some cases.

That is how it's done! Now, I can safely tell you that we've been eating on these meals for over two weeks as planned -- I think we will at the very least get one more full week out of them, and then we will be ready to do another round of cooking. Isn't that exciting? It is for me... I haven't had to think of a meal to cook for dinner in over 2.5 weeks!!

If you think that this plan is something you might want to do for your own house -- you can even start with a mini plan which is only 5-6 meals to give it a try. If you want to try it out go to: Once a Month Meals, and decide which plan is for you. The regular membership has menus for 9 different dietary restrictions, but they can't be edited. The Pro membership (what I got) you can edit and swap out the recipes on the menus for anything in the database of thousands of recipes.

If you are just finding this post -- Here is the post on Planning, Here is the post on Shopping, and Here is the post on Prepping.

I hope that this helps everyone get on top of their cooking, and gives you some valuable time back in your evenings!! Enjoy!

The Hits Keep On Coming...

When I woke up this morning, I knew something wasn't right... I didn't want to jump to conclusions too quickly - so I stayed in bed trying to wait it out and see if I was just stiff from sleeping funny. After about 30-45 minutes, I couldn't wait anymore.

I woke John up and told him that something was wrong. He was going to get the boys up to take me to the ER, but I was able to spare us the trouble and drove myself to the ER. I was having some really bad pain in my back on my right side and knew it just wasn't normal.

I got to the ER, and of course in the amount of pain I was in... my blood pressure was through the roof. That seemed to the the only thing they were initially worried about... because they certainly were quick to push medicine for that. I knew if they found the source of the pain, it would come down.

Things went from bad to worse when they decided to run some blood work -- because the nurse blew out two of my veins before we finally got someone else to try to get my IV started. In the process of all that, I got super nauseated -- which isn't uncommon for me as things spiral and go wrong. One of the veins just pumped blood into my arm all morning - and looks pretty gnarly tonight!

They finally got things going, and the blood work showed that I had a UTI... but that wasn't all -- I ended up showing kidney stones as well before the day was done.

When I talked to the doctor, she told me that I couldn't have anything more than Tylenol unless I was going to have someone pick me up from the hospital. Not a problem, I was going to have John bring the boys to pick me up when I was ready... but no.

The nurse came back not too long after and told me that I couldn't have the meds unless someone was in the room with me. Good times. You think my blood pressure isn't going to skyrocket when you force my two toddlers to sit in the room with me?!

Luckily, it took some time for the boys to get there -- long enough for me to get my dose of antibiotics, and be basically ready to go... but James still made his presence known when he got there. His experience at that hospital must have been memorable because he literally lost it when they pulled into the parking lot. Poor buddy.

John lit into the hospital staff for this complete waste of everyone's time... and to add insult to injury -- they made such a big deal about giving me the meds, but they didn't wheel me out to the car. They didn't walk us out to the car. They did absolutely NOTHING to make sure that I didn't get in my car in the parking lot and drive home.

I find that insane. They would have been much better off wheeling me out and putting me in the car... what a joke.

I've been laying low and pushing fluids for the rest of today... the funniest part was them giving me a work release for 2 days. Who am I going to give that to? The boys?! HAHAHA!! Lay off of Mommy boys -- I've got a work release!

Resurfacing

I pretty much disappeared in the middle of a blog challenge, and I'm so sad about that. Good thing I over commented on the days that I participated - so I did manage to complete my commitment. I've been so ill in general that I can't manage to get much of anything done other than take care of the boys and get our meals prepared.

The visit to my orthopedic surgeon didn't go as well as I had hoped. I do have an official diagnosis on that end, but no treatment was done for me. My blood sugar is out of control right now, and any treatment that could be done on my shoulders would cause even more problems with that issue. I'll get to see an endocrinologist next Thursday - so hopefully from there things can start falling into place.

For right now, I'm struggling to keep up because my body aches continually... I'm having trouble sleeping... and my chemistry is off from taking bad advice from a doctor that I questioned. I should know better, and trust my gut... but I let him sway me... never again.

I've got a rare moment with the boys being at school that I can sit down to blog. I miss writing so much, but it just isn't easy right now.

On a happier note, I want to take a moment to tell you about something AMAZING that happened. I found out shortly before the holiday that my Scentsy sales for June were quite noteworthy! I was the #1 seller for my sponsor's team in June by having sales more than double the amount of the next person on the list. Additionally, I was #3 in sales for my entire up-line of 2,800 people! I'm amazed! I am NOT a salesperson at all... which tells you something about these products, they are so amazing they sell themselves. My love for the company and joy in offering these to friends and family got me here. I would LOVE to help anyone else reach their goals as well - my commission this month will cover a car payment and our insurance! Would you love to help your family while staying home with your kids? Let me help you turn your scents into dollars - join my team - I'll coach you and walk through this path to success with you!

A few July specials I want to share with you as well...

It's Bring Back My Bar month, where our wonderful fans vote to bring back 20 retired scents to be sold for 1 month only! Stock up while they are available!

 $5 for 1 bar

$14 for 3 bars (save $1)

$25 for 6 bars (save $5)

$85 for the entire collection of 20 bars!  (save $15)

My personal favorites are: Cashmere, Citrus Sun Tea, Luscious Lemon, and Maui Mist

 Ohana is adorable, and such a cute representation of summer! It is 10% off this month - $31.50!

Lemons & Berries is the scent for July and is described as: A refreshing as a frosty-sweet glass of lemonade on a hot day: Juicy strawberries and red currants cut with a blast of zesty citrus.

I'm launching a customer reward program this month as well this month, and would love to tell you more about it - leave me your email in a comment - and I'll send you the details. 

Finally, I've got a couple of blog friends hosting parties for me this month...  it would be worth it for you to check out these parties... trust me, click over! Shannon - Life After I Dew and Pam - Our Love Nest (Pam's party starts on the 9th)

OWIE!!

I know that I owe you guys some updates and a few more photos from the holidays - and of course some photos from the boys' dedication... but for today - I need to take a moment and tell you about my most recent foray in to the world of doctors and medicine.

Ever since I have delivered Tyler, I've been having pain in my shoulders and arms. It's been fairly constant, but most noticeable when trying to do something behind my back - like take off my bra at night... or sleep on my tummy. Before I got pregnant, I'd always sleep on my stomach with my arms under my head and/or pillow. Now, I can no longer do that... and actually was the first symptom that I noticed in this crazy problem.

I had a check up with my primary care doc sometime in the weeks shortly after Tyler's arrival, and he put me on some steroids to try to help alleviate the pain - but they didn't work. So at my last visit, we talked about my need to go see an orthopedic surgeon... his advice, not my suggestion. Well, I left his office thinking that I'd give it a little longer to see if it would go away on it's own. It's been about 5 or 6 weeks and nothing has changed - it's actually gotten worse.

So I made the appointment, got the referral and off I went this morning. I've never in my LIFE seen a waiting room that full - it was literally standing room only - and that includes several patients in wheelchairs. Anyway - my appointment was scheduled for 10... at 11 - they called me back... I got x-rays before anyone really even talked to me. Once the x-rays were complete, the doctor came in to talk to me about what's going on.

It seems that my post pregnancy hormones are allowing my body to become inflamed at an alarming rate. I've got two bum shoulders, a problem with my neck that is pinching a nerve causing my right arm to go completely numb, and a bum hip! Geez! Since the initial round of steroids didn't help me - he went straight for injections.

They had to call my insurance company before they could give me the injections - since when does a DOCTOR need to call insurance for permission to treat their patient? Seems backwards to me. Anyway - they did approve the injections, and the doctor came back into the room with the most inhumanly large needles I've ever seen. They must have been 3 feet long!

I'm not kidding either - because they literally were longer than the needles I used for my fertility drugs... scared the snot out of me. You know they're long when the actual doctor is the one that gives the shot... it's normally the nurse, right? Holy moly! It could have been much worse - or maybe he rubbed some sort of numbing agent on my skin because I didn't really even feel them going in... but while he was injecting the medicine - there was this weird pressure and pain sensation. Not cool!

I've still got numbness in my right arm now - and neither of them feels much better. I don't really know how long to expect it to take for some relief. He prescribed physical therapy for me 3 times a week for the next 4 weeks... and then I go back to see him. You know, cause I have time for physical therapy! He didn't really give me anything for my hip other than an oral medication that is supposed to be for pain... or some sort of muscle relaxer - hopefully a little of both!


So - I'm back at home hoping that the pain will stop soon - because lifting the kids hurts... and carrying James up and down the stairs makes me get teary-eyed! It's bad.

Speaking of James... little dude is teething again and was up last night at midnight and 3 SCREAMING inconsolably... not fun for him or for us. It's an extremely helpless feeling when there is really nothing you can do other than hold him and pray for the Tylenol to start working. Darn that teething tab recall! I'm literally watching him on the video monitor right now rolling around and doing just about everything except take the nap he so desperately needs.

Tyler is in the swing screaming at me at the moment too - this kid is a trip. He eats like a bird in the morning but once noon rolls around - he's a bottomless formula sucking machine. He eats 4 ounces every 2 hours between lunch and bedtime... then he's ready to eat again at about 3:30 or 4 in the morning. It's nuts! Sometimes he'll take more than 4 ounces in a bottle, but he still has trouble keeping all of that in his belly... so we really can't go up much more than we already are. I'm thinking he's a candidate for getting cereal before 4 months old... maybe that will help? Who knows?!

Finally, I started a new business this week - I'm now an independent stylist for Stella & Dot. I'd love it if you'd check out my website - there are some AMAZING products on there! I'll be back with more about that on Monday... and a couple of opportunities for you to win some free stuff from me. :-)

The Plague

My goodness, I think that the germs of the world have united to try to take out the Hawkins family lately... I think James has been sick for most of the last three weeks - off and on... he started with a cold. Both boys had that problem, actually.

Then this week, while Daddy was out of town - James caught a stomach bug. It was awful... there was lots of spewing - and in a matter of one night... I had to strip two beds and change James and I into 4 different outfits a piece! After three days, I think he's on the mend...

Of course, though... now I have it. UGH! I woke up in the middle of the night not feeling well... and ended up laying on the floor of our shower for a while. Glamorous life I lead, right?! I didn't even get out of bed today until well into the afternoon... John and James went to do our grocery shopping, and came back with a Sonic iced tea for me - it's my favorite next to Starbucks... and then they made my favorite soup. It's a Chicken and Wild Rice soup recipe that we fell in love with last fall, I think.

I just had some of the soup - which is my first meal today, and I'm about to head back to bed. Hopefully, we'll all be healthy this next week and we can get down to the business of preparing for Christmas and celebrating the season.

Unexpected Doctor Visit

The last few days have been rough on me physically - to name a few of the symptoms I've been experiencing:

* Swelling (I know... it's part of pregnancy)

* Nausea with a vengence

* Headaches

* Ringing/Buzzing in my ears

* Drowsiness (this one is interesting - I'll be sitting here fine one minute and the next I'm fighting literally to keep my eyes open)

* Sudden Blurry vision

All of these are signs of preeclampsia or pregnancy induced hypertension - except I'm missing the key symptom in the whole deal... my blood pressure is like a dream right now. It's bizarre!

So anyway - I called on Tuesday to get a refill on my Zofran prescription - to at least combat the nausea... but they wouldn't give it to me. Instead they wanted to see me immediately. So that freaked me out a little and I retreated - I asked them to let me wait it out one more day and see if the issues were just a fluke or something. All day Wednesday though was much of the same... so they made me an appointment for 8 yesterday morning.

Of course, being that my OB is so super fabulous... she had zero idea of why she was seeing me when she walked into the room yesterday morning. Almost an hour late - because she was delivering a baby. (No worries on being late - but it would have been nice for her staff to let me know that little fact)

So I went through my symptoms - only I didn't know to mention the ringing of the ears or the drowsiness to her... because I hadn't read the website I linked to until I got back to the office. I sort of feel like it's her job to ask those questions though if there is a battery of symptoms - you might just ask if your patients are experiencing any of them... since most of us don't know the signs as readily as the doctor should!

Once again - I left the office with no information or really anything to help deal with these issues. They took blood work - and are having me do another 24 hour urine collection... joy! So I guess we'll see if they call me before I go back on the 10th.

I did tell her while I was there that under NO circumstances will we be tying my tubes during the delivery - to which she started telling me that I'm a bad candidate for birth control pills because of my health issues. I almost find this funny - because I was on the pill for the better part of 10 years or more... partially under HER care... and no one said a word to me. Not to mention that I had weight loss surgery in 2007 - and haven't had blood pressure problems since then... catch up with the train lady! Geez!

I can just about guarantee that once Tyler comes and we get through my recovery - I'll be looking for a new OB/GYN before we try this again. I'll likely ask my PCP for a recommendation - because so far he has only recommended one doctor that I haven't loved.

The other day - I was googling to find her number... because I was too lazy to reach down and find my cell phone... and happened across a website where you could write reviews of doctors. She had like 17 reviews written about her... and I find them mostly to be accurate with my experience... some folks were outraged by her... others loved her... but overall, people said that during the delivery she was wonderful... but that the exams and visits leading up to that - they felt like she wasn't listening to them/hearing them and that she was too rough when examining people. I'm a little freaked by that part - because we haven't gotten to anything in terms of physical exams really since the first visit during this rollercoaster - and I'm sensitive as it is... so the pain factor will suck. I guess I'll forgive her though when I get the good drugs during delivery.

Speaking of which - I pre-registered with the hospital last night for Tyler's delivery... and I'm just wondering if we can go ahead and get that epidural flowing now so that we can ensure our ZERO pain birth plan. :-) HAHAHAHA!

Doctor with Issues

I took a little pole on Facebook last night - just to see if I was being hyper-sensitive about an issue that I've been having with my obstetrician. Don't get me wrong... I like her... and I think she's a great doctor. Certainly if someone was going to do surgery on me - she's one that I'd choose... and she has, so I'm pretty confident in that. I just wonder if she'd be someone that I could deal with "coaching me" through a vagnial delivery... Sometimes, her bedside manner leaves a little bit to be desired.

In all fairness - I have to say that my primary care doctor is the opposite extreme - he has the best bedside manner of any doctor I've ever known... so I might just be a little spoiled by the fact that he's the doctor I see 99% of the time.

Back to Dr. S... she's really nice, but I sometimes think that she's got ADD... or at the very least she's not listening to me. I know that some people - probably most - blow smoke when they talk to their doctor's about things going on with their bodies. Especially weight gain or things of a similar nature... sure it's easy to try to build yourself up and look for an easier solution to the problem than the hard work it takes to lose weight or whatever. I get it - I really do... TRUST me... as a weight loss surgery patient - I spent a LOT of years in that boat.
 

One thing I've learned over the last - almost 3 years - since my surgery... is that I'm not afraid of those conversations anymore - do I still hate them, absolutely! They just don't scare me anymore though - I don't dread going to the doctor (or I didn't before getting pregnant) and getting weighed. Probably because with Dr. W (my primary doc) I can talk with him on a real level about what's going on and he'll give valid suggestions - knowing that it's a very difficult struggle.

Dr. S on the other hand is not that way - I've tried to talk to her about how I am NOT eating with the mindset of "I'm eating for two" or an army... I'm not even really able to eat too terribly much at one time - I just eat about every 2-3 hours. Sometimes is it a cookie that is not necessary - sure... but that shouldn't account for the amount of weight gain I'm experiencing. Yesterday, John even tried to explain it to her - and she didn't harp on it quite as much... but she still mentioned it and told me to watch it.

Watch it do what? Continue on with whatever it's going to do?

Should I workout - probably, but ya'll I just can't. By the time I've worked a full day, gotten James home, spent a little time with my family, cooked/eaten dinner, gotten James ready for bed, worked in a little tiny bit of sleep for myself, gotten up for a night-time feeding with my growing boy... there's nothing left - in terms of time or energy. And when I say nothing... I mean you could sit me in a padded cell and watch me drool - because there is literally nothing left in my body that can even move.

So, anyway - I digressed a bit... because I was getting around to talking about another issue that keeps repeating itself with Dr. S.

Since my first appointment - she's been pretty set on the fact that I'm going to be a c-section delivery. Pretty much every conversation is centered around that, but oddly when you push her on it - in terms of asking what the point in taking a childbirth class would be if you're having a c-section... she will then backtrack and tell me not to give up on a vaginal delivery. UGH! Make up your mind - because if it's going to be a c-section... that's fine with me - I just don't want to waste any time away from James on an evening or weekend taking a class that won't matter to me in the end.

**Edited to add - I am an insulin dependent diabetic while pregnant - it's not technically called gestational diabetes since I had a history of it before my weight loss surgery... but that is a factor in the prediction that Tyler will be a big boy upon delivery time.

On top of that - every time we go in for our monthly visits... she asks me about tying my tubes. It's sort of subtle, because she'll frame it in terms of me letting her know if that's what I want... but every time it shocks me. I've tried to ask if it's medically necessary - and tried to figure out if she's recommending it... but I can't decide what the deal is. I mean there I am - pregnant for the first time and every single time I see the doctor - she brings this up. Sup with that?!

We'd like to have a third child someday - hopefully a girl... of course not anytime in the next year... (Geez, can you imagine?!) But, we don't consider ourselves done with James & Tyler... one more would make us happy. That being said - mean who is to say that I could be blessed with another miracle pregnancy? No one, only time will tell if that's in God's plan for us... so certainly we'd be open to adopting another child if that was the route that we felt we were being led... but am I of the mindset of cutting off the opportunity for God to do his magic again? Not on your life. The only reason that would be okay with me at this point in my life would be if it were a life and death situation.

I was glad to see that of my friends that responded last night - almost everyone thought it was odd. That makes me feel so much better about being sensitive when asked... and not understanding why it would even come up. I guess maybe in her own way - she's just trying to be efficient and means nothing by it, but she's dealing with pregnant women... and she KNOWS my history. She submitted my story to TLC to be on a television show for crying out loud...

What do you guys think? What would you say in my shoes?

What to say...

I'm at a loss - a big huge stinking loss... Which is weird... my brain is so cloudy it is almost blank. Have you ever felt like you were in a room but completely invisible... even to yourself? Like you're just sitting there - you can see the action of life happening around you - but you just can't quite engage in the moment...

It's surreal, to say the least.

There was an episode of ER during one of the seasons where Cynthia Nixon played the role of a mother that had a stroke. In this episode, they played it for a good portion of the show from her perspective... and it was interesting because she was completely aware of everything that was happening - but she was unable to communicate that back to the doctors.

I sort of feel like that a little bit.

Like I'm in here, and I know this isn't normal... for me or for anyone... but I am helpless to pull myself out of it and begin to get back to normal. Like for instance, at this very moment... I am sitting under the brightest florescent lighting known to man, and I could literally pass out right now and sleep for hours.

I can feel my heart beating - which is weird, because normally - I am moving and talking to people and don't even notice it.

The visit with my doctor went well - without much discussion - he agreed that I needed something for a month or two to combat all the things I've been feeling... so he gave me a prescription, and we'll see where we go from there. He did say though that for some people, the medicine can actually make it worse... so if I start to see signs of that - to call him back next week.

So I guess that's it - I'm on "meds" now... you know the ones... the kind where if you start to act funny - people ask if you've stopped taking your "meds"... yeah, those.

The pharmacist said that they might make me drowsy - so I'm going to hold off on taking it until this evening - because I can't afford to literally fall asleep here at the office... and I'm fighting it hard enough!

Changes

I've heard that other than death and taxes... change is the only other thing you can count on in life. Well, I guess I'm about due for some of that.

In the summer of 2004, I went with my stepmother to pick up my little brother that my parents were adopting from Guatemala. He was around 18 months old at the time, and I remember that trip so vividly. He was a cute little guy that was happy as long as you didn't move him or change what was happening.

You want to play with toys on the bed, fine... he was perfectly happy. You want to walk around with him in his stroller, fine... perfectly happy. Although, if you needed to change the current pattern of activity or his clothes... he freaked out and a typical toddler temper tantrum would ensue.

I can sort of relate at the moment. There is something particularly hard for me right now with Sundays and Mondays... I can't even put my finger on it. I just know that those two days of the week are the hardest for me emotionally - I mean it's not normal for me to get weepy because I have to get out of bed... much less go to church... I love my church! Believe me - if I could figure out how to write it out and process it... I'd be doing that.

There is just so much swirling in my head lately, and I feel like junk. Literally! The nausea, headaches, and just general sickness are back in full force.

I was thinking through some things on my way to a church event this afternoon. I was thinking of all the change that has come over the last few months, and how people process through those things... the only way I can really compare it would be to say that it is much like the process of grieving.

You see, I've been taking every bit of the uncertainty and anger over our infertility and the end of that process out on my body. I go through these stages every now and then... a stage where I get so fed up with all the things that are wrong with me - that I sort of go into denial about it all.

I stopped the fertility shots, drugs, and such in September - but I also stopped taking my diabetes medicine, my thyroid medicine, and doing anything that might be considered healthy. I sunk right back into my "happy place" and medicated with food - specifically sugar. I know this is all wrong, but in the moment - you are helpless to stop it when you are hanging on by a thread.

When you wake up and start realizing what is happening - you're almost helpless to fix it. In a way this makes me feel like a failure on two issues (fertility and weight loss), and add to that a work situation that is emotionally stressful to the point of almost making you feel like you are a worthless employee... and you have a perfect storm driving my emotional state right now.

Please hear me say that I am 100% excited about adoption... and believe whole-heartedly that this is our God given path at the moment, but that doesn't mean that it doesn't sometimes cross my mind that there are things that I will miss out on if I never physically bear my own child. I am so excited about the opportunities that are just around the corner for us through our adoption... it's just hard to not have much to push forward to at this point.

So, that is pretty much where I am... I know that there is a lot that I need to do for myself... but at the same time emotionally - I think I need something to help level me out a little bit possibly. I don't know - I'll talk to my doctor tomorrow about what he thinks... but maybe just for a month or so just to level me out in order to have the strength/courage to tackle all the things that I need to tackle in order to get back on track.

• Start a new diet plan... I'm highly considering the Gylcemic Impact Diet through ediets.com
• Start working out again in some form
• Start back on my thyroid medications
• Start back on my vitamins and supplements
• Continue taking my diabetes medicine
• Figure out what it is that I want to do with my life... in the future
• Get back to my normal life...

Back/Neck Update

Well, I just got off the phone with my doctor - and apparently, I'm an idiot. Okay, let me clarify... the doctor never said that - I did. When I was there a week ago, he had a different course of treatment planned for this pain in my neck and my back... he was going to treat it with a tapering dose of a steroid type medication.

I sort of cautioned him away from that initially because every. single. time. I take steroids... I end up blind. Like can't see to drive or do much of anything that isn't right up under my nose... blind. Normally - I'm sort of an "eagle eye" with perfect vision...or I used to be - its slipping a bit as I get older.

Anyway, so with the impending blindness - I balked a little bit at taking what he wanted to give me. Dummy! Here I am a week later and things haven't improved much if any at all.

So I called this morning as promised if the pain hadn't gotten better... and I'm starting his original treatment plan this evening... just call me the HULK! HAHAHA!

In addition, he wants me to start physical therapy three times a week... seriously? Ya'll - I can't afford to do that... especially with my time right now, and seriously - if it's not a one shot deal with the copay issue... I can't pay $20 three times a week on top of everything else I have going monetarily.

Can't I just be a cute little addict over here in my corner and not bother anyone? No, I know that's not an option... nor is continuing pain.... so we'll see what they have to say and evaluate from there.

It's never dull around here!