Friday, March 4, 2011


I have gotten some good comments and some bad comments from yesterday's post, and I felt like I needed to say a few more things about the topic. In my migraine induced, sleep deprived state of mind that has been the sum total of this week - I neglected to make one of the points that I really wanted to put out there.

I've said this before, and naturally it is my opinion. This isn't up for debate really, but I can respectfully accept that not everyone will agree with me.

The thing I neglected to say is that I absolutely do not think that anyone's job defines them. I have always hated that question at parties and social gatherings because it just is such a small fraction of who a person IS. During the day, I am a database administrator and fund-raising professional. That does nothing to define who I am, what I stand for, what I believe, or even what I find important in this life.

One commenter went so far as to tell me that I am what is wrong with this country.

Oh really?

If a woman who spends every waking moment trying to make life better for her husband, children, family and friends is what is wrong - then yes, I am that person.

If a woman working to raise two infant boys into strong men who can do whatever they want in this life (including be a stay at home father if they so choose) is what is wrong with America - then once again, I'm guilty as charged.

If a woman who will work to teach my children that their job does not define them but their legacy through their relationships with others is the most important aspect of their lives is what is wrong with our country - I am guilty.

If a woman who believes 100% in the institution of marriage and the vows she took before God and who would stop at nothing to support and love my husband completely is what is wrong - I am guilty again.

If a woman who struggled through 8 years of infertility with as much grace and sincerity as one woman can muster with both good days and bad is what is wrong with America - lock me up and throw away the key.

If a woman who will spend every day of my life being grateful for the gift of a woman who chose life and adoption above abortion is what is wrong with America - that is me! 

If a woman who is a sinner, but lives through her faith in God to do the very best I can is what is wrong - lock me up and throw away the key.

I don't claim to always get it right, but I try my best - as I like to believe that we all do. Blogs are a fun and interesting form of social networking, because so many of us have taken up our own piece of the web to use as an outlet. I have always chosen to allow people to say whatever they wish about my writing - as long as it is done in a way that isn't obscene - and I let differing opinions fall where they may. I don't apologize for my views, as my critics likely wouldn't either.

Ultimately though, I am pretty proud of the person I strive to be: a good Christian, a good wife, a good mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend, an infertility survivor, a writer, a recipe collector, a database administrator, a fundraising professional, and all the other facets of what makes me the whole person that I am.